Dating Tips, Relationship Advice For Women and How To Understand Men
bedazzle wrote:Using rules like that during dating is playing a game and not being authentic. A man can sense that (not necessarily consciously) and it acutally impacts his ability to develop feelings when it is a challenge. He feels the challenge and then he starts playing the game, at this point it becomes mental vs emotional. He was willing to wait that long because it was a game he wanted to win, it was not about the sex. He has now achieved his goal but maybe there were other things not in place for him as far as what he wants in a relationship to keep staying interested.
I know there are a lot of "rules" out there for dating but the most important thing is to be authentic. Have sex with a man when you feel it is right for you, not an arbitrary 3 months. I have read a good 25-30 books on dating, relationships, sex, marriage, break ups, etc, etc written by both men and women. And yes, I read the one with the 30 day rule and all the reasons why. I was sold on that when I read it. However, over time, I have found that the balanced consensus is don't jump into bed right away with a man, but do it when you are ready and are willing to risk that he may leave.
I am sorry, I know those are not words of comfort. There is really nothing you can do at this point. Hopefully the guy is just busy and will come around. If not this may just be one of those lessons that life brings.
bedazzle wrote:But why 90 days? You had a goal in your head too. Most women don't tell the guys the 90l day rule, but men have intuition too.
Just a thought.....
What would another plausible reason be? Just curious, I am open to other's thougts too.
bedazzle wrote:You started your first post with that you did the 3 month rule for sex. Did you or did you not then have a certain goal in mind as to how long you were going to wait for sex?
bedazzle wrote:My apologies, there is a book out there that touts a 90 day/3 month rule and I misunderstood since that is how the post was titled and started.
Unfortunately you would need to ask him to know really why he left.
My guess is that he got the final prize and there was something missing with the whole package for what he wanted in a relationship and decided to bail. If men are unhappy with something they won't necessarily share it, especially in a new relationship. I have heard several women on this forum be surprised when a man pulls a houdini.
Without knowing more about how you two related and issues you had, I think anyone's guess is as good as another's. Unfortunately there is nothing you can do.