I have been seeing this guy for 15 months, constantly seeing each other at least once a week, sometimes more depends on our work schedule, as we live 2hr drive apart. We have good times when we are together, great laughs, romantic dinners, countryside rides, whatever nice things you can think of, and of course great sex too!
I have brought up the topic of being in a relationship with him 6 months ago, and went into the darkest moment ever in my life, because he told me that he was not looking for a relationship but he loved me and wanted to keep me. After the talk he disappeared for a good 2 months, with zero contact with me, ignoring all my calls/texts and emails. Then I decided to give up and move on before new year then he came back to me, acting double as sweet as he had ever been.
I understood he needed time to sort out his feelings and that was what he told me about the withdrawal. And I agreed on taking things slowly to see where it would head to. But now another 6 months has passed and he becomes more and more attentive and we seem more and more like a couple, so I brought up the topic again (maybe it was a bad idea), just last night, before I wrote this. And here is what I got from him.
He said he loves me so much and wants to be with me forever, but it doesn't have to be in a relationship or marriage, he admitted that marriage is something that he doesn't want in his life. He doesn't understand why I am so into having a label and was trying to let me know that we still can have all these wonderful things without any relationship. I said I don't want to be just fiends, he said he understands and said I'm more than that. That's it. No definition of what I am to him. I feel like I'm in a cloud which blurs away my views if that makes sense. I don't even know what I am!
Maybe you can say I'm too desperate, but I think a label is always what most of women want from the man they love, right?
I'm not going to bring up this topic to him again, it's non-sense anymore, I love him so much but I am thinking if I should leave him now as I can't see any hope or future in us. I can't be in this "nameless" zone forever although I still can have his sweetness.
Should I tell him clearly that I might leave? Or just wait?(for what?) or just fade myself away from his life?
My story is a bit too long, thanks everyone for your patience!
Last edited by Sweetpanda
on Mon Jun 04, 2012 5:55 am, edited 1 time in total.