What to say after no contact?

Want to patch things up and get your ex back? Come here.

What to say after no contact?

Postby claudia0076 » Sun Jun 24, 2012 11:46 pm

I've been using no contact for about a week now with my exboyfriend. Actually we weren't in an official relationship so there was never an official breakup. There was love between us though, and great sex. I happened to see him on another woman's facebook, cheek to cheek, in a picture. I couldn't take it as I can't help but wonder if he wants her and well as me as well as whoever else. I consider him an ex now, and a player, and in order to get over him I'm using no contact. He texted me today but I didn't answer.

If I had my way, he would be my boyfriend and committed to me. We already have love, and great sex and an emotional connection but I don't want any other women in the mix.

I don't know what to say to him. I don't know how to break no contact and briefly, yet effectively, let him know that I would like to be with him, but only if it's a true, exclusive relationship.

What can I text to him? I'm willing to start over, but it has to be a different relationship than we had before.
claudia0076
 
Posts: 3
Joined: Sun Jun 24, 2012 9:28 pm

Re: What to say after no contact?

Postby Marshwiggle » Mon Jun 25, 2012 12:59 am

I have cheek to cheek photos with men that I am not interested in when I am out partying! Its usually when everyone goes in for the squish hug for the photo. I know its not nice to see, but do you even know how old the photo is?
Would he have noticed that you haven't talked to him in a week? He really is going to have no idea why you have stopped talking to him.
I suggest that you just talk to him, don't attack him though or he will feel like you do not trust him (not good if he is in fact innocent). At this point I don't know if its innocent or not but all you can do is casually say what makes you feel uncomfortable and hope that he will do his best to not make you feel that way but also still be himself.

I don't mean to thread hijack but its a good title for a lot of people on here who are wondering what to say to an ex or even a boyfriend after a time of no contact. Does anyone have any suggestions?
Marshwiggle
 
Posts: 88
Joined: Thu May 17, 2012 11:49 pm

Re: What to say after no contact?

Postby claudia0076 » Mon Jun 25, 2012 10:08 pm

I'm all for my man having women 'friends' as long as it's crystal clear what they are. But when I suspect there is more going on I'm going to react. This time it was with no contact. So it's been about a month of not seeing him (he lives about an hour away). When I first used no contact he almost blew my phone up because I didn't answer it. When I finally did answer I told him I had seen the picture. Oh by the way, next to the picture the woman had written "had a fantastic weekend with my man". I told him I saw the picture and he said she was a friend. Yeah right.

Anyway, I went back to no contact because I really want to get over this guy. I went out on a couple of dates and saw some old guy friends. Now my emotions are way better. I never did beg, cry or act foolish to him, thank GOD. I kind of knew that wasn't they way to do anything.

So, today he called again and I answered, and he asked me to type him a letter. I said I would, as I want to see him to see how I feel about him in person. I'm not sure now. He might just disgust me and that would be fine. In my mind and heart I think I still love him, but maybe not. After some thought I've decided I won't sleep with him, even if it's tempting. If it comes up I'll tell him that if he loves me, and if he doesn't want to see other woman, he can wait and we can start over, with dating. Not sure how that will go over. Actually I'm not even sure he'll show up. If he's gone again, then it's no contact again.

One of these days I'll either be completely over him, or we'll be really together. I have no idea which way it will go right now. And in the meantime, I'll be working out, having fun and dating.
claudia0076
 
Posts: 3
Joined: Sun Jun 24, 2012 9:28 pm

Re: What to say after no contact?

Postby Marshwiggle » Mon Jun 25, 2012 11:34 pm

Yah that doesnt sound good.
Why does he want you to write him a letter? If he wants to talk to you shouldn't HE be typing the letter?? :lol:

Sounds like you have made your mind up about him in the last couple of days. Thats good. That will make it easier to stick to your guns.
Hope you are feeling better soon. It sucks.x
Marshwiggle
 
Posts: 88
Joined: Thu May 17, 2012 11:49 pm

Re: What to say after no contact?

Postby claudia0076 » Wed Jun 27, 2012 12:04 pm

I need a man's opinion.....

Last night I texted him: "I just wanted to say goodbye, (his name). I believe we had love and passion, and if you ever decide that we really would be good together, let me know."

I know what I was saying, but how would a man take this text?
claudia0076
 
Posts: 3
Joined: Sun Jun 24, 2012 9:28 pm


Return to How To Get My Ex Back



cron